This is what we Yell About!

(Special thanks to Sandy , Laurie &  John (home page) for posing for the photos. Ironically, it seems that people who do yell, don’t want their pictures posted!)

You made it to the game on time…thankfully, but not without a boat load of stress, because your boss wanted to see you, just as you were trying to sneak out a bit early so you wouldn’t be late again.  It was a rush to get here, but you did it…right kid, right equipment bag, and right arena!  Now you can relax and enjoy the game.  It is your goalie’s turn to play this game and it is always a thrill to watch him play.  You always hold your breath just a little, even though your mantra to your goalie is “it takes a team to win and a team to lose” to help him settle in to the positive energy he needs to stay calm and stay focused.  You are sending him positive vibes whenever the play is in your end, and then it starts…. two ladies from behind the glass start to yell at the referees to do their job.  You feel embarrassed and frustrated at the same time.  Not only because they are yelling at the referee, but also because you know it doesn’t have to be this way.  


What Not to Yell Inc. is about shifting culture, and raising performance of all stakeholders in the system.

Its about understanding that everybody has a role in creating a Spectator Intelligent Culture.  Just like a body.  When there is a disease in the foot, it effects the heart, the head… the whole body.   Hence we need to look at the whole system (not just the foot).  Parents, Coaches, Volunteers, Officials, Staff, and the Players.

This is about seeing your role in this systemic issue, and helping you see how you can make a positive impact on changing the culture, and transform the experience,  1 adult at a time.

This is about how we lead ourselves in stressful situations.  This is about getting back to our core values and why we put our kids in sports in the first place.  For the LOVE of the game.

This is about helping sports associations and clubs make the intangible tangible.  Measuring their culture and enabling them  to do something about it.

Our goals, similar to sports organizations are:

  1.  Safety;
  2. Growth & Enjoyment
  3. High Performance

If you were to ask yourself why you got involved, or signed your athlete up in the first place, chances are, the answers have nothing to do with anger, aggression, ruthless competition or even a “winner take all” attitude. More likely,  answers look something like this: 

Positive audience response in youth sportsParent Answers

  • I wanted my child to learn the value of team play and co-operation.
  • I hoped to encourage my child to get some exercise and to learn good sportsmanship.
  • Build Confidence.
  • Learn Leadership skills.

Kids Answers

  • Because I love “x” sport!
  • I was hoping to make new friends!
  • I want to be just like *insert name of a superstar here…..

Coach Answers

  • To help kids learn to love the game the way I do.
  • To help kids who might not otherwise have many opportunities in life.
  • Because I wanted to share my skill sets.
  • Because it’s the right thing to do – giving back to the community.

These are all noble reasons to participate in youth sport and yet somehow, sometimes, our behaviour is anything but noble.

We know that no one “signs up” for verbal abuse, frustrated parents, being yelled at and certainly not for physical or mental abuse. Who would “sign up” to get paid for that? No one.  So at What Not To Yell Inc., we focus on the concept:  Change your Thoughts, Change the Game. (**with a nod to Wayne Dyer for the phrasing style!)

Your “performance” is as important as the athletes and at What Not To Yell Inc. we help parents, coaches, officials, volunteers and youth sports associations  understand the critical role each plays in helping children to have a positive sports experience.




Here is our invitation to start a conversation about how you can think about things differently, how you could start to think about the “S.I.” culture:

“Imagine just for a minute, if the losing team was more respected then the winning team. Without a loser, there is no winner. Would you watch the game differently?

magine if that bad call the official just made prevented your kid from breaking his arm.

Imagine if you understood that the coach cutting your kid from the AA team was a life lesson that set them up to handle a work situation 10 years later. Perhaps it was that experience that allowed your son or daughter to handle such a situation with professionalism and wisdom setting him or her up for a very successful career.

We want to help you develop the wisdom, the techniques and the strategies for managing, calmly, those times when you feel anything but calm. We want to help you develop a Spectator Intelligent Culture.

Who We Are:

Melanie WanlessMelanie Wanless, Chief Yeller,  is a Certified Executive Coach and Certified Training and Development Professional with extraordinary expertise gained over many years in the fast-paced, constantly changing and stressful medical device/pharmaceutical industry.

With extensive business experience in training, leadership development, facilitation, workshop design and delivery, sales training and coaching, executive coaching, and organizational development, she is uniquely suited to bring a fresh perspective to sport with her mantra “Change your Thoughts, Change the Game.”

What Not To Yell Inc. and Spectator Intelligence is the product of extensive research in the field, with her 3 boys playing hockey and lacrosse  from House League to Junior. She had the “out of body experience” when her oldest player was just starting out and had to transform herself with “What Not To Yell”. Complement that with plenty of experience volunteering as a coach,  parent rep, sports association Board Executive and a tournament volunteer at the provincial level,  it’s now time to share her expertise with associations across the country.

In addition to  our immediate team, we have a network of Executive Coaches and Training and Development professionals from across the country to support the needs of our clients.

The Team Behind the Scenes:

Heidi Weigand, PhD in Management with a focus on leaders contagiously inspiring the innovative mindset and positive leadership.  Heidi is an Associate Professor at the St. Mary’s University, and Director of Community Relations and Research at the Centre for the Study of Sport and Health.  Heidi’s expertise in building mental resiliency in the sports community.  Heidi is working closely with WNTY Inc. to support our research.

Marsha Denvir,  is a Certified Organization Development and Change Professional and Coach.  She brings a holistic behavioral science approach  used to understand and develop healthy organizations and create a sustainable environment where people and productivity thrive.  Marsha brings her passion and creativity to support WNTY Inc. in workshop design, facilitation and team coaching.

Teena Bartley is a Certified Executive Coach, Workshop Designer and Facilitator.  She brings contagious energy to everything she does, including her boys soccer!  She has a passion for leadership development and helping organizations drive results. Teena is certified in Sean Delaney Culture Shaping, and thrives in creating high performance  leadership teams that transform culture.

Our Trusted WNTY Inc. Advisers and Mentors

Lynn Bennett, President at Leadership Intelligence and a Certified Management Consultant.

Carol Sachowski, as a Certified Executive Coach, facilitator, mentor and Certified HeartMath®  Trainer.


Our Mission: Transforming the experience, 1 adult at a time.